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The Lamia Hiss

The Lamia Harlot Hissing.

I make various off colour jokes on social ideas and constructs that seem weird or off to me. Possibly remarking why I cannot confess to being human really--humans make no sense to me. Typically including my ideas and thoughts on these rather weird ideas, conclusion jumping to the left, as I step around to the right to see what people are thinking here. Then I thrust some mind viruses in to really drive you insane.

But you know what? I just know history will repeat itself again.

Hope you enjoy me bitching people out.

2011-03-23

Do you like anal sex? Do you have any anal toys?

This is a tough one... as I would normally enjoy it. Being such a tight arse makes this not an easy thing for me to do, in reality. So to actually get it into my arse, it takes an insane amount of lube, playing and well--apparently gay bathhouses have a scented aroma that relaxes arse muscles. Which is not something that is really shared outside those sorts of groups (I learned by accident). Though, to get a penis of average male girth into my arse, I kind of had to do enough of that aroma stuff that I had issues moving my arm and leg muscles during the act... which, in full honesty, the lack of ability to move on my own free will just made the act even hotter... I am kind of fvcked up, I think.

On the anal toys thing... I really do not have any toys right now. It would be nice if I did. However, the first toy I am looking into is the Magic Bullet. So that I can go into the kicked and get an awesome tossed salad... or just use it for orgasming elsewhere. I heard there was a similar item called the Baby Bullet. Which either is a vibrator for a small child... or an erotic home abortion sex toy. However, with what is on the internet, nothing surprises me any more.

But yeah, maybe after I get a Magic Bullet, I might start to look into beads (never actually tried them... well... not recently, I did once about seven years ago). Not certain a buttplug really makes sense to me. It is a tad bit unfortunate that I honestly have issues listing sex toys, outside of Dildos, Beads, Positional Vibrators (like the Magic Bullet) and Plugs, without moving into silly stuff like fuzzy handcuffs, feathers, whips, chains, etc. As I honestly doubt there is nothing between those two steps.

I do not want people constantly asking me about Grim Fandango

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